What About Wednesday: Compare Yourself | Awakened Aesthetic

[[Once a week I ask the same bleary-eyed question: “What about Wednesday?” It’s my day to post whatever the hell I feel like, with no regard to fashion, eco-consciousness or, occasionally, even coherent thoughts.]]

[Image by al natural]

I don’t understand this obsession we have with comparing ourselves to each other.  Moreover, I don’t understand why those comparisons always reach such negative conclusions.

“My blog doesn’t get as many comments as hers does.”

“Her shoes don’t go with her outfit nearly as well as mine do.”

“She’s prettier.”

“I’m smarter.”

“She’s luckier.”

“I’m better.”

It’s inevitable that, the moment you group women in their teens or twenties together, they’ll start to insulate themselves by talking about other people.  Then they’ll further insulate themselves by talking about each other, moving into smaller and smaller groups…until there’s just two or three girls, feeling insecure and acting strangely adamant that they’ve rated everyone else’s worth – and their own – and can now be satisfied.

Okay, that last part is a lie.  Living that way is never satisfying. I know, because I’ve done it.  Hell, who hasn’t?

[Image by Kyn. Lauren]

It’s easy to look at someone else’s accomplishments and be jealous, or to view their failures as a direct result of your being somehow better than them.  But let’s be honest here: what is all that comparing good for, other than praying on your own fears and making you feel less like your own person?  If the majority of us spent half the time we use to compare to, instead, express ourselves organically…well, we’d see a lot more interesting personal style choices.

We’d also see a lot more artistic expression.

We’d see all of those outfits we loved, but weren’t sure about wearing.

We’d see people telling their friends and aquaintences how awesome they are, instead of thinking it, jealously.

So, from now on, I’m going to care less about how I stack up and more about who I am at my core.  Who cares if they whisper, if they don’t comment on my posts or think my hair looks funny?  The only thing those people are doing is insulating themselves, while I get to make friends with abandon and wear really crazy-looking shoes.

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Comments (8)

October 21, 2009 |

File under: Behind the Aesthetic, What About Wednesday?

8 Responses to “What About Wednesday: Compare Yourself”

  1. I wish that comparing ourselves didn’t HAVE to be so damaging to ourselves. There are parts of it I believe that can be useful, inspire us to grown, challenge ourselves, try new things. But at the same time, I’m guilty of falling in to the bad habits as much as the good ones.
    .-= Ashe Mischief´s last blog ..IFB Presents: Links á la Mode =-.

  2. Jaka Merriman says:

    This is something I actively try not to do in social circles, but have yet to eradicate it from my own self-talk. For some reason I can see the futility of doing it to/with other people but not with myself.

  3. Jen says:

    Her blog gets more comments, but mine is still better. http://retwt.me/1f5IL

  4. Jen says:

    What About Wednesday: Compare Yourself http://bit.ly/sl35A

  5. [...] What About Wednesday post this week was about comparing yourself to others & how it can go wrong. I loved [...]

  6. Ginger says:

    Thanks for the reminder!
    .-= Ginger´s last blog ..What’s your take on virginity? =-.

  7. [...] how I felt when I flipped over to Awakened Aesthetic today. Every Wednesday, Jen throws out her usual format and just says what she wants to say. This [...]

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